Cajun Humor

Cajun Horoscopes

Some Cajuns are pretty skeptical of horoscopes and the people that readthem. If we are to ever fully understand all the star signs and the peoplethey represent, we need symbols that are true Cajun.

OKRA (Dec 22 - Jan 20) Are tough on the outside but tender on the inside.Okras have tremendous influence. Older Okra can look back over his life andsee the seeds of his influence everywhere. You can do something good each day if you try.

CHITLIN (Jan 21 - Feb 19) Chitlins come from humble backgrounds. AChitlin, however, will make something of himself if he is motivated andhas lots of seasoning. In dealing with Chitlins, be careful they may surprise you. They can erupt like Vesuvius. Chitlins are best with Catfishand Okra.

GRUBWORM (Feb 20 - March 20) You have an overwhelming curiosity. You'reunsatisfied with the surface of things, and you feel the need to bore deep into the interior of everything. Needless to say, you are veryintense and driven as if you had some inner hunger. You love to stay busyand tend to work too much. Nobody in their right mind is going to marry you, so don't worry about it.

MOON PIE (March 21 - April 20) You're the type that spends a lot of timeon the front porch. A cinch to recognize the physical appearance of MoonPies! Big and round are the key words here. You should marry anybody who you can get remotely interested in the idea. It's not going to be easy. Youalways have a big smile and are happy. This might be the year to think about aerobics. Maybe not!

POSSUM (April 21 - May 21) When confronted with life's difficulties, possums have a marked tendency to withdraw and develop adon't-bother-me-about-it attitude. Sometimes you become so withdrawn,people actually think you're dead. This strategy is probably notpsychologically healthy but seems to work for you. You are a rare breed. Most folks love to watch you work and play. You are a night person and mindyour own business.

CRAWFI S H (May 22 - June 21) Crawfish is a water sign. If you work in anOffice, you're hanging around the water cooler. Crawfish prefer the beach to the mountains, the pool to the golf course, and the bathtub tothe living room. You tend not to be particularly attractive physically, butyou have very, very good heads.

COLLARDS (June 22 - July 23) Collards have a genius for commmunication. They love to get in the melting pot of life and share their essence with theessence of those around them. Collards make good social workers,psychologists, and baseball managers. As far as your personal life goes, if you are Collards, stay away from Crawfish. It just won't work. Save yourselfa lot of heartache.

CATFISH (July 24 - Aug 23) Catfish are traditionalists in matters of theheart, although one's whiskers may cause problems for loved ones. You Catfish are never easy people to understand. You run fast. You work andplay hard. Even though you prefer the muddy bottoms to the clear surfaceof life, you are liked by most. Above all else, Catfish should stay away from Moon Pies.

GRITS (Aug 24 - S ept 23) Your highest aim is to be with others likeyourself. You like to huddle together with a big crowd of other Grits. Youlove to travel though, so maybe you should think about joining a club. Where do you like to go? Anywhere they have cheese, gravy, bacon, butter, or eggsand a good time. If you can go somewhere where they haveall these things, which serves you well! You are pure in heart.

BOILED PEANUTS ( S ept 24 - Oct 23) You have a passionate desire to help your fellow man. Unfortunately, those who know you best, your friends andloved ones, may find that your personality is much too salty, and theircriticism will affect you deeply because you are really much softer than you appear. You should go right ahead and marry anybody you want to because in acertain way, yours is a charmed life. On the roadof life, you can be sure that people will always pull over and stop foryou.

BUTTER BEAN (Oct 24 - Nov 22) Always invite a Butter Bean to a partybecause Butter Beans get along well with everybody. You, as a Butter Bean,should be proud. You've grown on the vine of life, and you feel athome no matter what the setting. You can sit next to anybody. However,you, too, shouldn't have anything to do with Moon Pies.

ARMADILLO (Nov 23 - Dec 21) You have a tendency to develop a toughexterior, but you are actually quite gentle and kind inside. A good evening for you! Old friends, a fire, some roots, fruit, worms, and insects! Youare a throwback. You're not concerned with today's fashionsand trends. You're not concerned with anything about today. You're almost prehistoric in your interests and behavior patterns. You probably want tomarry another Armadillo, but a Possum is another somewhat kinky matingpossibility