A Simple Life
I often wonder what the secret is to raising children. I always look to those who proved successful. Today there seem to be fewer role models and the children of today are more protected than any other generation.
When I was younger parents would let their children walk to school, or walk to the store and even a mile or so to visit their friends. We also did not buckle up in seat belts and even rode in the back of pick-up trucks...especially on Halloween night. It was the only way we could all fit. I also look back with fondess on drive-in theatres, where we rode to and from in the back of a truck.
My mother is one of ten children. Most of her siblings are wealthy. Some may think that would be an advantage, but it really was not. Most of those children have yet to grow up and still rely on Mom and Dad's money to pull them through.
However one of my Aunts who lives in a modest home. Raised 5 successful children with very little money. She had a garden and she never worked a day in her life outside of her home. Her sons had to work around the house and later had to get jobs to help purchase a car and then put themselves through college. I think they were too busy to get in trouble with the Law or involved in drugs. They were raised in church and taught the golden rules.
Recently we had our family reunion. 80% of the women (and a few men) have had plastic surgery....ya know face-lifts, liposuction, butt-lifts, nose jobs, tummy tucks, botox, collagen and a whole lot of boob jobs. And though some of them do look younger than they really are, none of them look as good (less wrinkles) as the simple Aunt that I mentioned. She has never had a vain surgery nor would she.
As we sat around discussing all the surgeries that have taken place since our last get together, I commented on the oldest most simple Aunt. And my Pop said "She looks so good because she has led such a simple life, the good life".
What are the things your parents did that you carried forth with your own children? I can honestly say not many, if any.
When people ask me "Where did you go to school?" I reply "How much time do you have?" I went to many, many schools. Because we moved alot. So, I decided that I wanted my children to have roots. Don't know if that is a good thing, it was just something I did not have. Guess that is why I still live in this house after 21 years.
But I see children raised by Preachers and good parents, who turn to drugs and law breaking acts. I think alot of kids problems are parents that are too busy. I know that all parents love their children, but sometimes their priorities get mixed up. I also believe that children are given too many material things and not enough time.
I wish parenting came with a fool-proof reference manual. And I wish I had all the answers....Don't we all?
When I was younger parents would let their children walk to school, or walk to the store and even a mile or so to visit their friends. We also did not buckle up in seat belts and even rode in the back of pick-up trucks...especially on Halloween night. It was the only way we could all fit. I also look back with fondess on drive-in theatres, where we rode to and from in the back of a truck.
My mother is one of ten children. Most of her siblings are wealthy. Some may think that would be an advantage, but it really was not. Most of those children have yet to grow up and still rely on Mom and Dad's money to pull them through.
However one of my Aunts who lives in a modest home. Raised 5 successful children with very little money. She had a garden and she never worked a day in her life outside of her home. Her sons had to work around the house and later had to get jobs to help purchase a car and then put themselves through college. I think they were too busy to get in trouble with the Law or involved in drugs. They were raised in church and taught the golden rules.
Recently we had our family reunion. 80% of the women (and a few men) have had plastic surgery....ya know face-lifts, liposuction, butt-lifts, nose jobs, tummy tucks, botox, collagen and a whole lot of boob jobs. And though some of them do look younger than they really are, none of them look as good (less wrinkles) as the simple Aunt that I mentioned. She has never had a vain surgery nor would she.
As we sat around discussing all the surgeries that have taken place since our last get together, I commented on the oldest most simple Aunt. And my Pop said "She looks so good because she has led such a simple life, the good life".
What are the things your parents did that you carried forth with your own children? I can honestly say not many, if any.
When people ask me "Where did you go to school?" I reply "How much time do you have?" I went to many, many schools. Because we moved alot. So, I decided that I wanted my children to have roots. Don't know if that is a good thing, it was just something I did not have. Guess that is why I still live in this house after 21 years.
But I see children raised by Preachers and good parents, who turn to drugs and law breaking acts. I think alot of kids problems are parents that are too busy. I know that all parents love their children, but sometimes their priorities get mixed up. I also believe that children are given too many material things and not enough time.
I wish parenting came with a fool-proof reference manual. And I wish I had all the answers....Don't we all?
posted by TamWill | 7:49 AM
8 Comments:
That was such a brilliant post and so bloody true.
I could write a book on the things I won't be brininging into my childrens lives from my childhood.
Take care xx
"What are the things your parents did that you carried forth with your own children?"
It's not fair for me to comment. We live 9 miles of gravel roads to the nearest town. I've always lived on this farm (56 years and counting) and I raised my kids in the same house as I was raised in.
My Dad totally respected my Mom when she yelled "Dinners Ready". We dropped everything went in to eat when it was ready. We always sat down as a family to eat and talk. We carried that on with my kids. The dialogue we so valued as a child is still going strong between us and our grown up kids.
I want to tell you that this is one of the most well written posts I have ever read. Excellent!!!
what a great post. i so agree with what so many things you said. when we moved to az a yr ago, we went much simpler. starting over forced us to do that but we love it that way and have noticed a wonderful difference in our boys and our family.
Hi Neighbor. You will have a lot more of the answers when the kids are grown.
But your involvement won't stop there. My saying is that I will be more and more involved with my family until I'm too old. Then I will sit in my rocking chair and watch things go by.
We'd be too old to write the book then. People who write them too soon find out they don't have all the answers, but sell a lot of books.
Reference Dr. Spock. We/I raised five kids pretty much by him, then it was decided his ways weren't all good.
Hang in there, it works out. I believe the more effort you put the better the kids are.
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People are constantly telling my how good my dog behaves. I tell them that my five kids behaved just as well. That's pretty much true too.
And they still are good solid kids. Only one did I have to bail out of jail. And he turned out to be the most regular good guy of all of them now.
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Great post! You're concerned so I think you are definitely doing things right. So many aren't concerned or either become concerned when it's too late. Sadly, so many parents don't want to be bothered with their children.
Excellent post. I think it is awesome that you have such a large family to reunion with.
Parenting is a combination of quality time and a lot of love. I bet you are an excellent parent.
Come visit my new blog...I am baaaaaaack!
Hmm, Lets see. One of the things that I do that my dad passed down to me was a little hug or touch. Too many times we are in such a rush to do this or that we forget to show people that we care about them. My dad still to this day when he walks by someone he pats them on the back or hugs them when they leave. I make sure I hug my children every morning, as soon as they get home from school and as often as I can. I have found it is the small things that my parents did that stand out the most to me.
Excellent post
Lovin' this post.
I think that alot of parents, especially the ones who have to put the kids in childcare, are too lenient. Alot, not all, give in to the whims of CHILDREN because they feel guilty about not being there.
Hey, I worked as a childcare provider for infants all the way through 8th graders for almost 8 years. You do what you have to to have your kids taken care of. Get over the guilt and be a parent, not their buddy. These kids have friends all over the place, what they NEED are their parents to BE the PARENT!
Ok, stepping off of my soapbox now.
Whew! I broke into a real tizzy. Thanks! It's been a long time! :-)
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